My Monica Closet: My Office

Oh, the poor tech guy from MakeItWork.

He even showed up at the door holding my rained-on newspapers. He had no idea what he was in for.

I brought him into my office. Oh, how it must’ve looked to this very hip, longish-hair, Dolce & Gabbana eyeglass frame wearing 24 year old.

Imagine a 10 by 10 foot room. In that room is a stairmaster, bookcase, tv, box for a Disney Princess 16″ Huffy bike with training wheels, three huge amazon boxes filled with Hannukah gifts for the kids (and, yes, I am that ahead of things), a weight bench, four miscellaneous boxes, 2 framed prints that have been leaning against the wall for 3 years and 10 months, my knitting basket, a basket of law school admission related books, a filing cabinet, and then – oh yes – an L-Shaped desk.

I should seriously take a picture of this, but it’s too disgusting. And if any of my law school admission consulting clients saw it, they would demand their money back. With interest.

So, I’ve avoided this long enough: A description of my desk…. (My best friend/personal assistant will wince as she realizes she’s going to have to read this and then sneak into my house and fix it when I’m not looking).

Sitting at my keyboard, on my left I can see a memo pad, client papers, a grasshopper toy from a Happy Meal, my video camera in some mysterious state of being charged, a roll of green painter’s tape, an orange toddler bowl, my checkbook, my work phone, my cell phone, my camera charger, a few photos….and that’s only the top layer. There is at least 3 inches of stuff underneath all of that. And this space is only 2 feet by 1 foot.

On top of my laptop keyboard (the one I don’t use for actual typing) are two notes. (Oh, crud! A call I was supposed to make 6 minutes ago!).

To the right, I know there is my business phone under there, but all I see is the address for our au pair who will arrive from Brazil in January. I’m hoping to send her a Christmas package of things from Santa Barbara. (Hello, personal assistant, please help me with this!). I have a stack of business cards in the original box (I run an online business – how often do I ever hand someone a card unless it’s going in a retaurant’s free lunch drawing?), my Office 2007 software (one of the best business purchases I made this year), my credit card swiping machine (which I seldom use and feel guilty for leaving plugged in all the time, but I have bumped my head too many times trying to plug it in while I’m on the phone with a client who is ready to pay me). My old address book is there. Can’t remember last time I updated it. Don’t even think I have an updated address book anymore. (Again, personal assistant will have a good time addressing my holiday cards). Stamps (thanks to personal assistant), web cam to talk to my parents for when the kids will actually sit still (and so they can see my plastic surgery progress, but that’s a whole other blog topic)….

And a coffee cup and saucer (from this afternoon, I swear), a receipt or two, a hotel-sized hand lotion, some random mail that I can’t see because it’s underneath all of the other stuff (bills?), my stamped and ready to go check for $30,000 to the IRS. (OUCH. Can’t bring myself to mail it. Too painful. That’s a new car, for *&!@&* sake!). My printer, actually working today – it helps that it’s actually plugged in to the computer today.

And, oh God, there’s a whole other length to my desk so I’ll just list what I see:

The ABA-LSAC Official Guide to ABA-Approved Law Schools

My stalled knitting project (I’ve never tried chart-knitting and I admit I’m scared)

My non-profit board agenda, a bowl of random cords and chargers,

A photo frame with two pictures of me and hubby from when we started dating (the twin towers are in the background…..)

An index card holder that (I think) has some CDs, photographs, passwords, key phone numbers and other random things I never need to access

A ceramic vase my grandfather made, with a flower cut out of construction paper by my 4 y.o.

New Bic Mechanical Pencils that I just had to buy while we shopped for Thanksgiving groceries last night

Sunglass holder (no sunglasses? crud.)

Another old and outdated address book

A bracelet my 4 y.o. made for me

It looks like a 6 inch stack of papers, including some old tax returns, clean printer paper, information about how my non-profit organization fights hate crimes, and a magazine article I cut out about someone who got a book published after showing she had a committed blog audience (hello people – please comment!!!!)

Blank envelopes

Address labels that are completely illegible (the one time my personal assistant f-ed up and she’s still kicking herself for it)….

Ok, I’m too tired to tell you what else was on this desk (or about the random pile of paper to be recycled at my feet) when the Make It Work tech came to help me.

And I’m also too tired to tell you how many times my kidsinterrupted as he tried to ask me questions about how I use my e-mail and why I’m getting two of every email for one account, and none of my e-mails for another account.

And the phone – literally – rang 6 times in 10 minutes. Seriously.

It was almost comical. And yet, this guy wants to be my regular tech and he sold me a 5-hour package (which 5 of his predecessors tried to do this year and failed).

He really seems to have solved my computer issues. So I have no excuse not to be working right now.

If only he cleaned desks.

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2 responses to “My Monica Closet: My Office

  1. I’m not looking forward to back to work next week. I have to admit, as much as I can’t stand to look at your desk, I am impressed that you actually can get your work done.
    PS. I thought you did not mind the awful address labels. lol.

  2. see, this makes me feel so much better about the state of my room right now (in BOTH apartments ::)) ….somehow we still get it all done!

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